Berner Phone
by Hannah Berner and Des Bishop
ComedyE · Explicit
Latest episode
Reacting to the Midterms
Reacting to the Midterms
About this podcast
The Berner Phone hotline is open! Comedian Des Bishop and special guests are listening to callers, dishing out their best advice, and being hilariously inspired by our dialer's contributions. Keep an eye out on Des's Instagram stories for prompts to leave a voice message and be featured on the pod. Whether it's pet peeves, secrets, life advice, dating dilemmas, or career questions Des and his comedian friends are dialed in.
Dial in to the Berner Phone Hotline
(917) 512-1758 or WhatsApp +1 (646) 423-7020 for the international dialers
Episodes
The newest 50 of 412 episodes
- Reacting to the Midterms · 1 h 15 min · Episode 167After the midterm elections, Des drinks too much coffee and accidentally talks about politics the whole time. Enjoy! NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: Travel hacks! Call (917) 512-1758 to…
- More Dealbreakers · 58 min · Episode 166This week, we're running back the "dealbreakers" prompt. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a voice memo on WhatsApp: +1 (646)…
- Dealbreakers · 1 h 14 min · Episode 165This week, Des reacts to your relationship dealbreakers. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: MORE DEALBREAKERS! Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us…
- Grief Humor · 1 h 8 minDes reacts to ways we cope with grief. Download Cash App today and make your money work for you. Click here to get started: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3wkdls8p #CashAppPartner…
- Happy Accidents · 1 h 1 min · Episode 163This week, Des reacts to your butterfly effect moments. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: Weird things people have said while you're grieving, funeral stories, anything grief/death related!…
- Your Prompt Suggestions · 1 h 17 min · Episode 162Des reacts to your prompt suggestions. Next week we're doing HAPPY ACCIDENTS - what was a moment in your life that changed everything for you, butterfly effect style? Call (917)…
- Workplace Annoyances · 1 h 13 min · Episode 161Des reacts to what's bugging you at work this week. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a voice memo on WhatsApp: +1 (646) 423-7020…
- Religious Trauma · 1 h 3 min · Episode 160This week, Des reacts to your religious trauma and gives a history lesson on the Irish famine. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: WHAT/WHO IS BUGGING YOU AT WORK? Call (917) 512-1758 to leave…
- Childhood Neglect · 1 h 16 min · Episode 159This week, Des decides whether or not the Dialers were neglected as children. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: RELIGIOUS TRAUMA / GOING TO YOUR RELIGIOUS FRIEND'S HOUSE Call (917) 512-1758…
- Celebrity Rumors and High School Incidents · 1 h 14 min · Episode 158Des revisits some classic celebrity rumors and reacts to "the incidents" at your high schools. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: RELIGIOUS TRAUMA & MORE CELEB RUMORS! Call (917) 512-1758 to…
- Wedding Traditions That Need to End (with Kelsey Cook) · 1 h 11 min · Episode 157Des is joined by guest and newlywed Kelsey Cook to discuss wedding traditions that need to end. Watch Kelsey's new special HAPPY HOUR on Netflix! FOLLOW KELSEY: Tickets…
- Ghost Stories · 1 h 7 min · Episode 156This week, Des the non-believer reacts to your ghost stories. Give us some prompt suggestions in the comments! Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers…
- Book Club Bonus: Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke · 1 h 11 minIt's finally here - the Yesteryear episode. What book should we read next? Let us know in the comments! Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can…
- What's Bugging You? · 1 h 3 min · Episode 155Today, Des reacts to what's bugging the Dialers, plus some leftover call-ins from the past couple weeks. NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: GHOST STORIES! Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a…
- Things You Thought Every Family Did · 1 h 10 min · Episode 154This week, Des reacts to the weird things your families did that you thought were completely normal until you found out not everyone's family did them. Call (917) 512-1758 to…
- Things You Used To Judge People For · 1 h 6 min · Episode 153Today Des reacts to things you used to judge people for but don't anymore, like being a Karen, children crying in public, and counting a pregnancy in weeks. Call (917) 512-1758…
- Mispronounced Words · 1 h 2 min · Episode 152This week, Des reacts to the Dialers' least favorite mispronounced words. We'll do another one of these episodes in the future - call in and comment below with more words! Call…
- Things Your Teenage Self Would Be Embarrassed By · 45 min · Episode 151What do you do today that you think your teenage self would be embarrassed by? A few Dialers offer birdwatching, wearing granny panties, and gardening. Let us know in the…
- Annoying Sounds · 1 h 10 min · Episode 150Today, Des reacts to all the sounds that annoy the Dialers, like garbage trucks, kids coughing, and ASMR. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can…
- Creative Insults & More Things We Believed As Kids · 1 h 18 min · Episode 149Today Des listens to your creative insults and some more things you believed as kids. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a voice…
- Silly Things We Believed as Kids · 1 h 2 min · Episode 148Des reacts to silly things the Dialers believed as kids, like getting arrested for turning on the lights in the car and watermelon seeds growing in your stomach. Call (917)…
- Biggest Gripes of 2026 (So Far) · 1 h 7 min · Episode 147This week, Des is solo and responding to the Dialers' biggest complaints about 2026 so far. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a…
- Funniest Things Said During Sex · 55 min · Episode 146This week, Des records solo from an undisclosed location and listens to voicemails about the funniest things people have said during sex. Call (917) 512-1758 to leave us a…
- What Generation Do You Wish You Grew Up In? · 1 h 16 min · Episode 145This week, Des listens to voicemails from Dialers who wish they grew up in a different generation. From club culture and technology to roller skating and funeral etiquette, Des…
- Niche Collections · 1 h 8 min · Episode 144This week, Des listens to voicemails about the strangest things people collect. From animal bones and troll dolls to rosary beads and matchboxes, the Dialers call in to share the…
- The Truth About GLP-1s, Peptides, and Fibermaxxing (Bonus Episode) · 57 minSurprise! It's a bonus episode! Dr. Elizabeth Kazarian joins Des to discuss GLP-1s, medical misinformation, and the overlap between politics and alternative health. Dr. Kazarian…
- This Should Be Illegal · 1 h 11 min · Episode 143Des is solo this week, listening to voicemails answering the question: "What was normal in your childhood that's illegal today?" From leaving kids in the car and bringing them…
- Des Solves Your Problems · 1 h 15 min · Episode 142Des is solo this week, giving advice to the Dialers on everything from how to handle a straight man making too many gay jokes to whether you should bring a gift to a destination…
- Irrational Childhood Fears (with Vittorio Angelone) · 1 h 19 min · Episode 141This week, Des is joined by comedian Vittorio Angelone! They discuss childhood fears like sharks living in pools, quicksand, and getting drafted. FOLLOW VITTORIO: Tickets…
- Is This Normal? (with Katie Boyle) · 1 h 11 min · Episode 140This week, Des is joined by comedian Katie Boyle to decide if the Little Dialers are weird or normal. FOLLOW KATIE: Website: https://www.katieboylecomic.com/ Instagram…
- Wisdom from Your Grandparents (With Caroline Baniewicz) · 1 h 6 min · Episode 139Caroline Baniewicz is back this week and helps Des respond to wisdom from your grandparents. FOLLOW CAROLINE: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinebaniewicz TikTok…
- The First Song You Loved (with Caroline Baniewicz) · 1 h 29 min · Episode 138This week, Des is joined by friend, comedian, and professionally trained opera singer Caroline Baniewicz! The Dialers share the first songs they remember falling in love with…
- Why Do Men Do This? · 1 h 13 min · Season 1 Episode 137Why do men play so many video games? Why do they loudly grunt at the gym? How are they able to use 12-in-1 body washes and still have great skin? This week, Des is solo and…
- What's Bugging You? · 1 h 11 min · Season 1 Episode 136What's bugging everyone this week? Des discusses running influencers, Reddit commenters, and the protein craze. Leave us a voicemail…
- More Things That Are Embarrassing That Shouldn't Be · 1 h 4 min · Season 1 Episode 135Des returns with part two of last week's prompt, "What is embarrassing that shouldn't be?" Let us know in the Spotify comments what prompts you'd like him to tackle next. Leave…
- Things That Are Embarrassing That Shouldn't Be · 1 h 4 min · Season 1 Episode 134This week, Des is solo and fired up by your responses to the question, "What is embarrassing that shouldn't be?" From waiting too long in a buffet line to using the bathroom on a…
- Episode #133: Advice With Maggie Hughes DePalo · 1 h 11 minThis week, Des and Chris are joined by comedian Maggie Hughes DePalo answering all the dialers needs for advice. Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on…
- Episode #132: AITA? · 1 h 8 minThis week Des and Chris are back answering whether the dialers are in fact the a**hole. Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on tour here.
- Episode #131: Traditions That Should End · 1 h 8 minThis week, Des and Chris are weighing in on all of the dialer's least favorite transitions that have got to go.
- Episode #130: Cheesy Slogans To Live By · 1 h 6 minThis week, Des and Chris are back on a dialer-heavy episode talking about their best cheesy slogans for life. Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on…
- Episode #129: Craziest Things You've Done For Love · 1 h 0 minThis week, Des and Chris are joined by Ali Kolbert reacting to the most unhinged things that the dialers have done for love! Ali is currently on the road with Hannah so check…
- Episode #128: Worst Financial Decisions · 1 h 5 minDes and Chris are back this week hearing the worst thing they ever spent money on and how much they spent. Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on tour…
- Berner Phone #127: Green Flags with Caitlin Peluffo · 1 h 21 min · Episode 127Today we're joined by guest host Caitlin Peluffo to talk about the dialers top green flags in dating and beyond! Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on…
- Berner Phone #126: Hills To Die On · 1 h 16 min · Season 1This week, Des and Chris are back finding out what hills the dialers will die on. Get tickets to see Hannah on tour here. Get tickets to see Des on tour here.
- Berner Phone #125: Passive Aggression · 1 h 6 min · Season 1The dialers are sharing the most passive aggressive things they've done or had done to them. get tickets to Hannah's tour get tickets to Des' shows cookunity.com/BERN for 50% off…
- Berner Phone #124: Little Gripes Part 2 · 1 h 12 min · Season 1The dialers are annoyed by so much that we had to do a part 2. get tix to Hannah's tour get tix to Des' tour
- Berner Phone #123: Little Gripes · 1 h 5 min · Season 1From nose breathers to doing dishes, the dialers are sharing the small annoyances that can ruin their day. get tickets to Hannah's tour get tickets to Des' shows
- Berner Phone 122: Wildest Holiday Traditions Part 2 · 50 min · Season 1We're back this week with more unique holiday traditions. We're in the thick of the holiday season so the dialers need a distraction. Put your headphones on, ignore your family…
- Berner Phone #121: Wildest Holiday Traditions · 1 h 7 min · Season 1We're getting in the holiday spirit this week. The dialers shared their family's craziest holiday traditions. get tickets to Hannah's tour get tickets to Des' shows
- Berner Phone #120: Controversial Takes Pt. 2 · 1 h 6 min · Season 1The dialers had so many good hot takes that we had to do a second episode. get tickets to Hannah's tour get tickets to Des' shows
