About this podcast
“Welcome to Season 13 of Myopia Movies! Each week, we dive back into the iconic films of the ’80s and ’90s that defined our youth, questioning the nostalgia and Blockbuster-induced myths we’ve held onto for decades. Do these classics truly hold up, or were our memories just playing tricks on us? Tune in as we put our childhood favorites to the ultimate test!”
Episodes
The newest 50 of 485 episodes
- The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas · 1 h 6 min · Season 13 Episode 590In honor of Dolly Parton, we’re making a detour on our musical month short for a trip to the Chicken Ranch. This week on Myopia Movies, Keiko spends 20 minutes looking up Burt…
- Phantom of the Opera (2005) · 1 h 35 min · Season 13 Episode 589This week we inaugurate a musical month with the music of the night, and its playing slightly flat. This week the Myopia crew goes down into the Paris sewers for Joel…
- Coraline · 1 h 15 min · Season 13 Episode 588Button eyes, a suspiciously perfect mother, and a tunnel that definitely should have been left alone. This week we riff on Henry Selick’s stop-motion nightmare-fuel masterpiece…
- House (Hausu, Japan, 1977) · 58 min · Season 13 Episode 587This week on Myopia Movies, we accept an invitation to Auntie’s house, which is a mistake, because Auntie’s house is hungry. Nobuhiko Obayashi’s 1977 Japanese horror-comedy…
- Don't Look Under the Bed · 47 min · Season 13 Episode 586Something is rotten in Middleton, and everyone thinks it’s Frances. Pranks are piling up across town, the adults are furious, and the only person who believes her innocent is a…
- Phantoms (1998) · 1 h 10 min · Season 13 Episode 585A whole town has vanished. Snowfield, Colorado, is empty except for a few corpses, a ringing phone, and a vibe that says "don't touch anything." Naturally, we touch everything…
- Chicago (2002) · 58 min · Season 7 Episode 584Six women charges with murder in Cook County and somehow they're the ones putting on the show. This week we're strapping ourselves into fishnets and existential dread for Rob…
- Showgirls · 1 h 53 min · Season 12 Episode 583Nomi Malone wants to dance. She wants it so bad she'll claw, thrust, and pool-vomit her way from a Vegas diner to the top of the Stardust Casino's marquee show — and we're along…
- Coyote Ugly · 1 h 16 min · Season 11 Episode 582A movie about a songwriter who is too shy to sing, solved by putting her on a bar in wet jeans. Violet Sanford flees New Jersey for Manhattan with a demo tape and roughly nine…
- Mean Girls Remastered · 50 min · Season 13 Episode 581We're digging into the vault for this one. The Plastics are back, Gretchen is still trying to make fetch happen, and so are we. Join us as we revisit our take on the 2004 teen…
- Ginger Snaps · 1 h 28 min · Season 13 Episode 580This week on Myopia Movie, we got a full moon coming up! We watched Ginger Snaps, where a Canadian teenager gets bitten by a werewolf on the same night she gets her first…
- Encino Man · 1 h 32 min · Season 13 Episode 579Two California teens dig a hole in the backyard looking for a swimming pool and instead unearth a frozen Neanderthal, thaw him out with a hair dryer, and enroll him in high…
- Jawbreaker (1999) · 1 h 6 min · Season 13 Episode 578This week on Myopia Movie, we got a candy-coated murder cover-up coming up! We watched Jawbreaker, where three impossibly glamorous high school mean girls accidentally kill their…
- Can't Hardly Wait · 1 h 31 min · Season 13 Episode 577This week on Myopia Movies, we got a yearbook coming up! We watched Can't Hardly Wait, where a lovesick teenager spends an entire graduation party trying to work up the nerve to…
- Pumping Iron · 58 min · Season 13 Episode 576Before he was terminating cyborgs or governing California, Arnold Schwarzenegger was just a well-oiled Austrian oak with a plan and a truly alarming amount of confidence. This…
- Super Size Me · 1 h 9 min · Season 13 Episode 575This week on Myopia Movie, we got a value meal coming up! We watched Super Size Me, where a documentarian eats nothing but McDonald's for 30 days straight...turns out "would you…
- The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters (Fixed) · 1 h 32 min · Episode 574This week on Myopia Movie, we got a kill screen coming up! We watched The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters, where a middle school science teacher sets a record against a hot…
- American Movie · 1 h 43 min · Season 13 Episode 573This week we start season 13 in earnest as we talk a month of documentaries! We watched American Movie, a film about being creative, the American Dream, and keeping the Surge…
- Independence Day (1996) Revisited · 1 h 51 min · Season 13 Episode 572Welcome to Season 13!!!!! This week on Myopia Movies we celebrate the 4th of July and America's 250th Anniversary the only way we know how, by watching most of it be destroyed…
- Independence Day: Resurgence - Summer Reruns · 43 min · Season 12 Episode 571This week on Myopia Movies, we return to a world that once united humanity… and immediately wonder if we should have just let the aliens win the first time. It’s Independence…
- Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home - Summer Reruns · 48 min · Season 12 Episode 569This week on Myopia Movies, we boldly go… to 1986 San Francisco. Yes, this week's summer rerun is Star Trek IV, the one where the fate of the galaxy depends on two humpback…
- Watchmen - Summer Reruns · 51 min · Season 12 Episode 569This week on Myopia Movies, we put on the mask, stare into the abyss, and then complain about the lighting. We dust off a paywall episode this week as we watch Watchmen—the most…
- Casino Royale (Daniel Craig) - Summer Reruns · 1 h 1 min · Season 12 Episode 568This week on Myopia Movies, we finally gamble big on Bond—real Bond. We dust off a previously paywalled episode as we’re talking high-stakes poker, parkour chases that feel like…
- AI - Artificial Intelligence · 1 h 40 min · Season 12 Episode 568This week on Myopia Movies, we're going full existential crisis with A.I. Artificial Intelligence — the 2001 Spielberg film based on the project Stanley Kubrick spent decades…
- Indian in the Cupboard · 1 h 18 min · Season 12 Episode 567Welcome to another episode of Myopia Movies, where we dig through the dusty toy chest of childhood nostalgia to explain colonialism to kids and ask the important question: “Was…
- Child's Play 3 · 1 h 21 min · Season 12 Episode 566This week on Myopia Movies, we head back to military school where the uniforms are crisp, the cadets are angry, and somehow Chucky has access to live ammunition. It’s Child's…
- Mannequin · 59 min · Season 12 Episode 565Welcome to another episode of Myopia Movies, where we ruin your childhood one VHS tape at a time. This week, we’re stepping into the neon-lit fever dream that is Mannequin — a…
- RoboCop (1987) · 1 h 3 min · Season 12 Episode 563This week, we head to the crime-ridden dystopia of Detroit where corporations rule, criminals laugh like maniacs, and the solution to urban decay is… a heavily armed cyborg cop…
- War Games (1983) · 1 h 41 min · Season 12 Episode 562This week on Myopia Movies, we learn that the only way to win is not to play. We watched War Games, a delightful romp about the apocalypse. Ally Sheedy is, like, stooping the…
- Transcendence · 1 h 2 min · Season 12 Episode 561This week on Myopia Movies, we watch Marvel's own Jarvis/Vision fight to stop AI by trying to stop Johnny Depp. It's not as fun as that sounds. We watched Transcendence (2014)…
- APEX (1994) · 1 h 7 min · Season 12 Episode 560This week, Myopia Movies kicks off an AI-themed month by diving straight into the bargain bin with A.P.E.X.—a time-traveling, robot-infested mess that wants desperately to be The…
- Super Mario Brothers (1993) Revisited · 1 h 23 min · Season 12 Episode 559Welcome back to Myopia Movies, where we revisit the films of our youth and ask the important question: Were these movies actually good… or were we just children? And today—Oh…
- Jurassic Park Rebirth (2025) · 1 h 2 min · Season 12 Episode 558This week on Myopia Movies, we watch yet another Jurassic Park/World Movie! Who will attempt to act with this idiotic script? Is this the dumbest new dino yet? Was it worth it to…
- The Electric State · 1 h 46 min · Season 12 Episode 557This week on Myopia Movies, we plug directly into the algorithmic void with one of the most expensive “what happened here?” movies in recent memory: The Electric State (2025)…
- War of the Worlds (2025) · 53 min · Season 12 Episode 556“This movie feels like a ChatGPT movie if there’s ever been one.” This week on Myopia Movies, the gang continues its tour through the worst films of the previous year with 2025’s…
- Snow White (2025) · 58 min · Season 12 Episode 555This week on Myopia Movies, we kick off our annual dive into some of the worst movies of the previous year. And we are starting with a real doozy: the live-action 2025 remake of…
- Cruel Intentions · 1 h 46 min · Season 12 Episode 554This month we revisit Cruel Intentions, the film that asked, “What if Dangerous Liaisons… but everyone shops at Abercrombie?” Schemes! Staircases! Smirks that could cut glass!…
- Scream 2 · 1 h 26 min · Season 12 Episode 553This week on Myopia Movies, we sharpen the knife and head back to Woodsboro in honor of Scream 7 slashing into theaters. That’s right — we revisited Scream 2, the sequel to a…
- The Craft · 1 h 25 min · Season 12 Episode 552This week as we continue the erotic thrillers month, we get a little witchy. We watched The Craft, the second best Neve Campbell and Skeet Ulrich of 1996, see the previous…
- Behind the Scenes · 27 min · Season 12 Episode 551This week on Myopia Movies, we give you a peak behind the curtains as we try to explain how we do what we do on the podcast and the Cineprov live show. From a veteran, a young…
- Congo (Rerelease) · 54 min · Season 12 Episode 550This week on Myopia Movies, we dig something out of the trash! Not the episode, of course, but the movie! Listen to episode 58 Congo remastered nine years later! Man, we have…
- Wild Things · 1 h 2 min · Season 12 Episode 549This week on Myopia Movies, we continue our Erotic Thrillers month with the spiciest 27 year old high schoolers you have ever seen! We watched Wild Things, one of the most paused…
- Traces of Red · 1 h 23 min · Season 12 Episode 548This week we start a slew of Erotic Thrillers with the first name you think of when you think erotic and thriller, Jim Belushi. We watched Traces of Red! A trashy movie set in…
- Con Air · 1 h 7 min · Season 12 Episode 547Hey everybody, welcome back to Myopia Movies. This week we’re tackling an action-silly Nicolas Cage classic: Con Air. And honestly—if you’ve never seen it before, I almost want…
- Mitchell · 1 h 15 min · Season 12 Episode 546This week on Myopia Movies, we learn a valuable cinematic lesson: you can be absolutely slovenly and still be the hero of a movie. We watched Mitchell. Yes, that Joe Don Baker…
- Doom (2005) · 1 h 4 min · Season 12 Episode 545This week on Myopia Movies we celebrate the New Year with a movie set in that very year, I am about as optimistic about this year as the title of the film. We watched Doom, a…
- Ernest Saves Christmas · 1 h 9 min · Season 12 Episode 544Enjoy this early Christmas Present! This week on Myopia Movies, someone needs to save Christmas and we know just the corporate spokesman, know-what-I-mean? We watched Ernest…
- Avatar · 1 h 28 min · Season 12 Episode 543This week on Myopia Movies, we watched the classic story where an outsider falls in love with an indigenous person and tries to protect them and their land. Ok, not Pocahontas…
- Eight Crazy Nights · 1 h 22 min · Season 12 Episode 542This week on Myopia Movies, we watch an entire town kick around a illiterate little person for 75 minutes. We watched Eight Crazy Nights, we tried to keep it festive, but Adam…
- Jingle all the Way · 1 h 40 min · Season 12 Episode 541This week on Myopia Movies, we watch a millennial Christmas Classic, Jingle All The Way! Bathe in the 1990s nostalgia as we visit trampling people for toys, malls, and toy…
