About this podcast
Primary Attribute is a Castles & Crusades actual play podcast where our cast unravels the mysteries of Arx Moltimus, a mountain fortress that contains the last surviving city, as it flies through the sky above a world consumed by a supernatural corruption and attempts to hold out for just a little longer. Battles are fought, romances blossom, secrets are uncovered, and city infrastructure is maintained against all odds.
Episodes
The newest 50 of 297 episodes
- SA031 – Halloween Special 2026! · 1 h 7 minIt's time for our yearly Halloween Special! The party has to rush to dispel a terrible transformation curse put on two of their members. They have, like, two or three hours until…
- 249 – Attack of the 60 Foot Kobold · 1 h 21 minThe battle for the Arx reaches its thrilling conclusion! The majority of the party scrambles to prevent massive casualties inside the shield. Meanwhile Cool Ranch is trapped…
- No New Episode on 10/14/2026 · 1 minHey everyone! There's no new episode on 10/14/2026, due to the tight timing of the recording session and Ian's lack of a personal time machine. (They're working on it.) We'll be…
- 248 – A Bird Dies as Itself · 1 h 17 minThe shield is finally descending! In mere moments, the Arx will be protected from the Corrupted army outside their city. Unfortunately, they've still got enemies inside and…
- 247 – Hull Breach Imminent · 1 h 21 minThe party desperately fights to prevent the door being breached, keep their people from being taken, and take down fuck-off-giant knights. And there's *still* a damn dragon to…
- 246 – It Fooshes · 1 h 13 minA cavalry charge plunges through the Arx defenders, and the party tries to stop it any way they can. They're going to take all the king's horses and all the king's men, and make…
- 245 – A Very Sudden Deceleration Over a Short Period of Time · 1 h 30 minThe Arx tries the fast way down. After all, what's a little terminal velocity between a flying mountain and a hard place? Plus, it probably still counts as a landing if you're in…
- 244 – Everything Goes Sideways · 1 h 9 minOkay, phew. That's the first wave (almost) down, and (mostly) everyone's still alive. What else could they have to throw at the Arx? Oh. Oh my. Grickx gets notified. Wealthy…
- 243 – The Greatest Album Cover In History · 1 h 23 minThe defense of the Arx continues as it descends slowly towards the ground. It's even doing so in a controlled fashion! So that's nice. Less nice are the corrupted infantry…
- 242 – Beginning Approach · 1 h 6 minLet's land this thing! It's a giant mountain, how hard can it be? The party forms ranks with the rest of the defenders of the Arx and stands ready to take on whatever the…
- 241 – Allocating the Resources · 33 minIt's time for the party to dramatically lean over a map, point at things, and make strategic choices about where to assign their tactical resources. Because what are the friends…
- SA030 – Leveling to 12! · 41 minIt's time for one last level up before landing this thing! Everyone grows immeasurably in power, by which I mean incrementally and in a way defined by exact numbers. Basically…
- 240 – Ziplock Baggie of Doom · 1 h 9 minThe party crams in some last minute studying before the exam. And by studying, I mean pharmacological research, and by exam, I mean "holding the line against a Corrupted horde."…
- 239 – Don’t Frack, It’s Whack · 1 h 17 minThe second set of drills is here, and the party practices their own parts in this master plan. How well will they do when they're the grunts, not the commanders? Like, that…
- 238 – Such A Specific Phrasing · 1 h 14 minDrill time! It's drill time! The party drills the Arx citizenry on what to do in case of a landing during a Corruption onslaught. Will they manage to whip these folks into a…
- 237 – An Ontologically Evil Moose · 1 h 24 minSteamboat Willie's fighting a moose! A corrupted moose! With no backup??? Everyone else scrambles to figure out a way back to help, but in the meantime we get to see how well…
- 236 – I Always Remember the Word Arx-Hole · 1 h 21 minThe grand experiment has gone awry, and now the Corruption attacks our brave scientists. With birds, the deadliest weapon (and confounding factor) known to Arxkind! How are they…
- 235 – Sleepytime Tea Needs No Sweetener · 1 h 15 minIt's time for a grand experiment! Can a dream fox start a fire so bright that their friends in reality can see it? Bonus question: How well can player characters handle being…
- 234 – Tell Us About Your Liquids! · 1 h 4 minVons finally revealed his terrifying dreams to the rest of the party. Now it's time to dig in and figure out how these things work and if we can use them for something cool! And…
- 233 – Gorgeous Picturesque Outdoor Views of Bullshit · 46 minDid you know that sometimes people sleep? And they risk dreaming?? Every time they do it??? Today, we follow Vons in a cautionary tale about what happens when you take that risk…
- 232 – Always Have a Backup · 1 h 10 minIt's always good to have a backup plan, so the party works on building themselves (and the citizenry) another escape route. As a bonus, they to get to visit with a few old…
- SA029 – Other Awesome RPGs! (Part 2) · 60 minWe're back for Part 2 of our dive into other RPGs we dig. This week we cover Night Witches; loose, improv-heavy games; and take a dive into accessibility in RPGs. Whit receives…
- SA028 – Other Awesome RPGs! (Part 1) · 40 minThis week, we try something a little different and talk about some other RPGs we enjoy! I know, we're *so* brave to admit it's okay to like more than one game. In our first of…
- 231 – Robert Rulesmasher Can Get It · 1 h 3 minThe rest of the party tries to help Wealdroa make a good decision when buying a mech body. Tries. Sort of. Cool Vons loves spoilers. Grickx checks reimbursement rules. Jyessi…
- 230 – Getting On Like an Explosive On Fire · 60 minVons has to hurry, or he'll be late! He speeds along faster than a rabbit with a pocket watch, but it wouldn't be Vons if there wasn't at least one tangent along the way. Oh…
- 229 – Get in the F-ing Mech, Wealthy · 1 h 16 minThe party continues to prepare for the upcoming landing. Whether that be by honing their weapons, considering what sort of body they want to ride into battle, or keeping…
- 228 – Kobold Nipple Lore · 1 h 11 minIt's time to do some campaigning! Grickx and Jyessi go out to knock on doors and talk to voters directly about the important issues of the day, like not letting everyone die from…
- 227 – Unpronounceable · 1 h 18 minThe party finishes their night of partying, campaigning, and learning about personal existential threats. Then, for a nightcap, they conduct a home invasion. Grickx sells the…
- 226 – Rock the Vote in the Clerb · 1 h 11 minThe party members each take some "me time" to go party. At the same place? Whoops. The only way this can get more dire is if two of them wore the same outfit! Cool Vons gets…
- 225 – Arxeology · 1 h 14 minPreparations for the landing process begin. Everyone does their best to support the effort, ensure the safety of their loved ones, and make a killing on the glue market. Grickx…
- SA027 – Triassic Playland (Pt 3): Real Torn Up About It · 1 h 23 minWe reach the thrilling conclusion of Triassic Playland! The party's really throwing their own spin on the story, and they decide to try a novel approach to solving their…
- SA026 – Triassic Playland (Pt 2): Leave Plan for the Time to Work · 1 h 26 minThe party heads out into Triassic Playland for a sedate tour in state of the art EVs. All everyone needs for the day to go well is for the electricity to stay on and, preferably…
- SA025 – Triassic Playland (Pt 1): Insurance Purposes · 1 h 28 minWe had a player down so it's time for an acting. Welcome to...Triassic Playland! As you can tell by the title, it's even *more* majestic than the original. Strap in as everyone…
- SA024 – Leveling to 11! · 1 h 24 minEveryone levels up to 11! Spells are chosen, hit dice are rolled, and a lot of wandering conversation is had along the way. Heads up that this level up session is extremely…
- 224 – No Bad Ideas in a Brainstorm · 1 h 7 minThe party convenes the leadership of the Arx Council to report their findings. It's time to make a tough decision: where's the best place to park. Jyessi makes a friend out of a…
- 223 – The Return of Skeleton Puppetry · 1 h 4 minThe party's quieted down the city's core for now, and they even all lived to tell the tale. Unfortunately, being alive means they now have to do things like "make decisions" and…
- 222 – Gravity is Subjective · 1 h 23 minThe party is going to get this core locked down or die trying. Let's see which one they go with. Cool Vons has that mid-air energy. Jyessi ponders reaction intensity. Wealdroa…
- 221 – The Zoomies Most Foul · 48 minThe core proves resistant to the party's attempts to fix it, but they won't let a little magical bolt of energy here and there get them down! Unless it kills them. I guess they'd…
- 220 – Too Hard for The Great Squirrello? · 1 h 8 minInto the core! It's finally time to see the heart of the Arx, and what can be done to maintain it. It probably just needs a little spackle and some fresh paint, right? Maybe a…
- 219 – Current Status · 1 h 10 minAfter finding out that The Great Wizard Dave has come down with a rather nasty case of skeleton-itis, the party gets ready to wreck his graduation orb. And possibly steal his…
- 218 – The Inevitable Kind of Surprise · 1 h 19 minThe secondary facility is back online and it's time to find the Great Wizard Dave. And more importantly, meet back up with Grickx and Steamboat! Grickx is back, baby! Vons finds…
- SA023 – Solstice 2025!: A Bubble of Candied Whimsy · 60 minIt's time for our 2025 Solstice Special! The party has a sweet cozy time on the Solstice where absolutely nothing goes wrong. Just kidding. The CK would never let that happen!…
- 217 – Oh No The Conses of My Quences · 1 h 13 minEach party member sees their reflection in the eyes of the Nonocculus. There's a brief moment of eye contact, where it seems the two sides of this fight might finally understand…
- 216 – Die Hard on an Arx · 1 h 11 minThe party tries to regroup, which is going to be tricky given three of the four of them are holed up behind barricades. Good communication is the only thing that can save them…
- 215 – There’s A Children’s Song Coming Closer · 1 h 11 minThe dreaded creature gives chase! To one squad. The others, meanwhile, bravely take advantage of the distraction and keep exploring to figure this place out. Clearly equally…
- 214 – Depth-First Search · 1 h 5 minThe split party moves swift and silent as they search the facility for clues on how to get it back up and running, all while being stalked by sinister creatures. Or, at least…
- 213 – Evil Glow In The Dark Stars · 60 minThe party enters a place full of the signs of struggle, magic gone wrong, and death. Then a strange song drifts up from the depths… Original Recipe Vons searches for a…
- 212 – The Forgotten Facility · 1 h 2 minThe party arrives at the secondary facility and attempts to get inside. Easier said than done. I'm sure there's no good reason for these barriers. Or the written warnings. It's…
- SA022 – Halloween Special 2025!: Vons’s House of 1001 Spirits · 1 h 10 minIt's our annual Halloween special! Vons is on the beach. The skies are grey, the rocks are alarmingly non-slick, and he has no idea how he got there. It begins to rain. But…
- SA021 – Punch Buddies Club (Part 2) · 55 minWe finish out Punch Buddies Club(house)! There is: a twist. Also, violence! Vons only wants what's best for his buddy. Jyessi feels left out. Driving goes poorly for everyone…
