The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast
από Danielle Black
128. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 8: Influence…
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The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast
Hosted by Danielle Black
A direct, evidence-based podcast for people navigating all-things separation and divorce, including; post-separation abuse, family violence, parenting, property settlement and the family law system - with a relentless focus on protecting children and building a life beyond separation. Because, the advice your lawyer gives you is only the beginning. Family law tells you what the system can do. This podcast helps you understand what to seek, what to challenge, what to bring into the room - and how to live with the decisions, and move on with your life, afterwards.
Danielle Black is a specialist post-separation parenting coach and the founder and principal coach of Danielle Black Coaching. Having navigated her own complex separation, and guided hundreds of clients to successful outcomes, Danielle and her coaching team specialise in helping protective parents to optimise the outcome for themselves and their children, and support clients to navigate post-separation situations that other professionals don't properly address.
Drawing on her extensive tertiary qualifications, developmental science, research, trauma-informed practice and both professional and lived experience, she examines how abuse can continue after separation, how systems and professionals respond, and what genuinely informed decision-making and credible advocacy requires when risk, fear or power imbalance is present.
Because understanding family law is not enough.
Having a lawyer is not enough.
A lawyer can advise you about the law, legal process and evidence. But optimising your parenting outcome also requires knowledge of child development, attachment, coercive control and trauma; the capacity to remain strategic under pressure; and the confidence to advocate for what you and your children genuinely need.
This podcast examines all of those layers.
It challenges the assumptions that routinely shape post-separation outcomes: the fixation on 50/50 shared care, the misuse of “friendly parent” ideals, the belief that compromise is always constructive, and the fantasy that engaging the right professional means you can safely hand over the strategy, decision-making and advocacy.
Across the podcast, Danielle explores:
• how post-separation abuse operates through parenting, financial and legal processes;
• what children need after separation - and why adult notions of fairness are an inadequate guide;
• what lawyers and other post-separation professionals were, and were not, trained to understand;
• why standard co-parenting frameworks often fail families affected by coercive control and other forms of family violence and post-separation abuse;
• how to assess the benefits, risks and real-world costs of negotiation, litigation and other pathways;
• how knowledge, capacity and advocacy can materially change outcomes;
• and what comes next, when separation and survival no longer occupy the centre of your life.
Expect direct language, research-backed analysis, practical guidance and a few cuss words - not platitudes, false balance or simplistic promises of justice.
This is not only about understanding what happened in your situation.
It is about making informed decisions now - and becoming the author, and authority, of what comes next.
To go deeper, explore The Post-Separation Parenting Blueprint™, Danielle’s flagship program for parents building the knowledge, capacity and advocacy skills needed to make informed, protective decisions after separation.
Learn more at danielleblackcoaching.com.au.
Επεισόδια
Τα νεότερα 20 από 130 επεισόδια
- 128. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 8: Influence, manipulation & loyalty conflicts · 42 λεπ.This is part 8 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says 'no', our job isn't to…
- 127. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 7: When we stop forcing contact · 48 λεπ.This is part 7 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 126. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 6: Encouragement, or coercion? · 1 ώ. 11 λεπ.This is part 6 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 125. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 5: Whose job is it to "fix" the relationship? · 37 λεπ.This is part 5 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 124. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 4: Your barrister is not an oracle · 1 ώ. 7 λεπ.This is part 4 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 123. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 3: Your nervous system is not an oracle · 57 λεπ.This is part 3 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 122. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 2: What the fuck is a "meaningful relationship" anyway? · 34 λεπ.This is part 2 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 121. When Children Resist or Refuse - Part 1: Why don't they want to go? · 35 λεπ.This is part 1 of our "When Children Resist or Refuse" series. This series explores what a child's resistance or refusal might mean. When a child says no, our job isn't to…
- 120. Is 9/5 the new 50:50? Care arrangements after Australia’s 2024 Family Law changes · 58 λεπ.Is nine nights/five nights becoming the new default parenting arrangement after Australia’s 2024 family law reforms? Danielle Black examines the rise of 9/5 recommendations in…
- 119. Parenting without court orders: More options than you might realise · 1 ώ. 25 λεπ.When parenting arrangements cannot be agreed upon, many protective parents believe they have only two options: give in to what the other parent is demanding or begin family court…
- 118. The Good Girl Contract - part six (finale): What your children actually need from you · 1 ώ. 14 λεπ.This is the final episode in the six-part Good Girl Contract series: Your children are not doomed by what they have experienced (and neither are you). But what happens next…
- 117. The Good Girl Contract - part five: The Contract after separation · 47 λεπ.This is where the lens widens. Parts 1 through 4 focused on the Contract as it operates in the woman herself - her history, her patterns, her practice of interrupting it. Today…
- 116. The Good Girl Contract - part four: Interrupting the Contract · 1 ώ. 7 λεπ.Part 4 of The Good Girl Contract series. This is where the series pivots. Parts 1, 2, and 3 were diagnostic in nature - naming the Contract, walking through what happened when we…
- 115. The good girl contract - part three: The mirror · 41 λεπ.If you have been quietly noticing that you struggle to accept other people's boundaries with you - that their no’s, their unavailability, their limits land in you as evidence of…
- 114. The good girl contract - part two: The moth and the flame · 40 λεπ.Their woundedness was a moth to a flame to your overfunctioning. Part 2 of The Good Girl Contract walks through what happened when you took the Contract into your adult intimate…
- 113. The good girl contract - part one: Where boundaries begin (or don't) · 27 λεπ.When your childhood taught you that having needs was dangerous - that being pleasing, useful, and indispensable was the difference between love and its withdrawal - the reason…
- 112. Working as intended (Postscript): Do I even need a lawyer? An honest conversation on self-representation · 1 ώ. 4 λεπ.If you have been listening to our Working As Intended series, and you have been quietly wondering "if lawyers were never trained in what my children need, and I have to bring all…
- 111. Working as intended - Part 4: How to use your lawyer · 38 λεπ.If you've been with Danielle across this series, you now know how the family law system in Australia was built, what its practitioners were and were not trained to know, and how…
- 110. Working as intended - Part 3: The standard - How to tell who actually knows what your children need · 48 λεπ."Child-focused." Two words that appear on the website of virtually every practitioner in the post-separation space. Every lawyer. Every mediator. Every divorce coach. Every…
- 109. Working as intended - Part 2: What an Independent Children's Lawyer (ICL) actually is · 31 λεπ.Nine hundred and fifty dollars. An online module and a one-day workshop. That's the specialist training that qualifies a family lawyer to represent your child's best interests in…







