Authentic Confidence with Dr. Aziz
autor: Dr. Aziz Gazipura, Psychologist and Author
Najnowszy odcinek
Why You Keep Putting Everyone Else First
Why You Keep Putting Everyone Else First
O tym podcaście
Do you worry what other people will think? Does it make you doubt yourself, feel guilty, and ultimately stop you from being fully yourself?
This can show up as people-pleasing and difficulty saying no. Or as social anxiety, staying silent in meetings, replaying conversations for hours afterward.
Dr. Aziz Gazipura is a clinical psychologist and bestselling author of Not Nice. He's helped thousands of people break free from self-doubt and the fear of others' opinions.
After 20 years of clinical work, Dr. Aziz discovered one pattern running underneath all of it. He calls it the approval trap: prioritizing approval over being yourself, saying what you mean, and going for what you actually want.
This show is for the person who looks confident on the outside and doesn't feel it on the inside.
New episodes every Wednesday.
Next Steps:
1. Discover your approval type.
Take the 2-minute quiz to find out which of the four patterns is running your work, dating, and social life — Diplomat, Avoider, Fixer, or Performer:
www.draziz.com
2. Apply for the Unstoppable Confidence Mastermind.
Dr. Aziz's flagship year-long program for serious work on confidence, authenticity, and freedom from self-doubt:
https://www.socialconfidencecenter.com/ucmv3
3. Watch on YouTube.
Every podcast episode is also available as a video, plus additional content not on the podcast:
https://www.youtube.com/@DrAzizGazipura
4. Read Dr. Aziz's books:
- Not Nice
- The Art of Extraordinary Confidence
- Doubtless
- On My Own Side
- Less Nice, More You
- The Solution to Social Anxiety
5. Connect:
Website: www.draziz.com
Facebook: facebook.com/DrAzizGazipura
Instagram: @drazizconfidencecoach
TikTok: @drazizgazipura
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drazizgazipura
Odcinki
Najnowsze 50 z 666 odcinków
- Why You Keep Putting Everyone Else First · 13 minBefore every decision, you run a calculation. Everyone else's preferences at full weight. Your own preference as a footnote, if it's there at all. In this episode, Dr. Aziz names…
- 5 Hidden Ways You're People-Pleasing Without Knowing It · 14 minYou already know the obvious people-pleasing patterns. This episode isn't about those. It's about the five subtler ones that look like generosity, thoughtfulness, or being a good…
- Why You Can't Say No Without An Excuse · 15 minYou don't want to host. Nothing's wrong. You just don't want to. That should be enough. It isn't. You scramble for a reason, and if you can't find one, you say yes. In this…
- Why Being Liked Never Feels Like Enough · 14 minYou already have people who like you. Family, friends, colleagues, maybe a partner. None of it fully lands. There's still a tightness in the meetings that matter, an anxiety…
- The Hidden Fear Behind Being Nice · 11 minYou've been taking quiet satisfaction in being one of the good guys. You give. You show up. You say yes when you want to say no. In this episode, Dr. Aziz walks through what's…
- Why You Can't Stop Replaying That Conversation · 11 minThe conversation happened. Hours ago. Days ago. Years ago in some cases. You're still running it back. You've tried to just let time dissolve it. It hasn't worked. In this…
- 7 Signs You Need People To Like You Too Much · 16 minWanting people to like you isn't the problem. Needing them to is. In this episode, Dr. Aziz walks through the specific moment when a preference for approval crosses over into a…
- Why You Can't Stop Caring What Other People Think · 15 minYou've been told for years that if you just cared less, you'd care less. You've probably tried. It hasn't worked. Not because you didn't try hard enough, but because the advice…
- Why One Negative Comment Ruins Your Day · 12 minTen people tell you the presentation was great. One person emails you afterward and says something dismissive. Which one plays in your head for the next three days? You already…
- What 20 Years Of Social Anxiety Actually Felt Like · 18 minThis episode is different from most of what Dr. Aziz makes. It's the story of what twenty years of social anxiety actually felt like, told from his own life rather than through…
- Are You An Introvert? Or Just Anxious? · 14 minYou leave the party, the barbecue, the work mixer. You're exhausted. You've been telling yourself for years that's just how introverts work. Maybe. Or maybe what you've been…
- The Real Reason You Feel Self-Conscious · 11 minYou walk into the meeting. The room is full. The next three minutes turn into a slow-motion nightmare where you can't access your own intelligence or charm. You've called this…
- Why People Don't Take You Seriously · 10 minYou spoke up. You were clear. You told them what you needed and by when. They said yes. Then the deadline came and the thing wasn't there. If you've been getting more direct and…
- Why Boundaries Feel So Hard · 12 minYou know the techniques. You've read the books. You can recite the scripts. In the moment, none of it shows up. The standard boundaries advice has been missing the question that…
- Why Facing Your Fears Doesn't Work · 13 minYou did the bold thing. You went through with it. It even went well. So why isn't the doubt gone? Why does the next meeting, the next date, the next big moment still produce the…
- “Be Yourself” Is Terrible Advice · 11 minRight before a date, an interview, or a family gathering, someone tells you to just be yourself. Has that ever actually helped? For most of the people Dr. Aziz works with, it's…
- You're Allowed To Push Back · 11 min"In those situations, it's not being defensive. It's defending myself. And those are two very different things. And one is actually extremely necessary and healthy." Someone…
- Why Saying No Feels So Bad · 12 minSomeone asks you for something. The word no forms in your head. What comes out of your mouth is yes. In this episode, Dr. Aziz breaks down why just say no more never quite…
- Why You Feel You Have To Earn People's Approval · 12 minThere's a pressure that follows you into every social situation. A running commentary that says whatever you're doing is wrong. You walk into the meeting, the party, the date…
- You’re Successful and Exhausted · 12 minYou're successful by every external measure. Some part of you is tracking, in real time, how you're coming across. Confident enough. Smart enough. Polished enough. The…
- You Look Confident But You Don’t Feel It · 17 minYou're more accomplished than you used to be. The doubt didn't go away. Three a.m. replays. Did I say the right thing. Why did I do that. Should have handled that differently…
- The Real Reason You Don't Speak Up · 12 minThere's a conversation you know you need to have. You've thought about it. You've maybe rehearsed it. The moment comes, and you don't say anything. The moment passes. It feels…
- Why You Still Care What People Think · 21 minYour boss doesn't quite make eye contact in a meeting. You text someone and they don't get back to you. And it sticks. The whole rest of the day, some part of you can't put it…
- Why You Feel Like You’re Being Judged All The Time · 13 minYou walk into a room and your guard goes up. Not because anyone said anything. Not because anyone is even looking at you yet. Just the room. If this is you, you've probably…
- Why You Can't Say What You Actually Mean · 13 minYou knew exactly what you wanted to say. Then something softer came out instead. It happens at work, with your partner, with your parents. Every time, you walk away wondering why…
- Why You Need People To Like You (Even When You Don’t Like Them) · 11 minYou can explain your work to a friend over dinner. In front of your boss, the same words fall apart. Most people call this social anxiety, or I just lack confidence in those…
- The 4 Ways You Override Yourself Around People · 15 minYou knew exactly what you wanted to say. Then something softer came out instead. There's a specific reason this keeps happening, and it isn't a confidence problem. In this…
- The Invisible Pressure to Not Be Yourself · 21 minThere's an invisible pressure pushing you to not be yourself. It doesn't show up as a dramatic moment. It's death by a thousand paper cuts. The meeting where you stayed quiet…
- Goodbye Shrink for the Shy Guy, Hello Authentic Confidence · 15 minAfter 12 years and over 600 episodes, Shrink for the Shy Guy is reaching its final installment. But this isn’t an ending—it is a massive evolution. Starting next Wednesday, this…
- Do You Feel Like You Belong? · 17 minDo you ever feel like you’ve done years of "work" on yourself, only to wake up and find you're facing the exact same fear, hesitation, or self-doubt you thought you’d finally…
- The Voice That Says It Won't Work · 15 minWhat if the real reason you hold back, soften what you say, or carefully rehearse how you come across isn’t actually about confidence at all? What if, underneath it all, there’s…
- Why You Get Anxious Before Interviews, Dates, and Presentations (It's Not What You Think) · 14 minWhat do job interviews, first dates, presentations, and social gatherings all have in common? They're all situations where someone could disapprove of you — and your nervous…
- The Moment You Start Managing Yourself · 18 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz explores what happens the moment you stop being natural in a conversation and start managing yourself instead. If you’ve ever…
- The Hidden Fear of Being Yourself · 18 minWhat if the real reason you hold back, soften what you say, or carefully rehearse how you come across isn’t actually about confidence at all? What if, underneath it all, there’s…
- Why You Keep Chasing Approval Without Realizing It · 18 minMost people don’t walk into conversations thinking they’re trying to win approval. They believe they’re simply being polite, agreeable, or easy to get along with. Yet beneath the…
- Finding Ground When Everything Is Changing with Dr. Dave · 45 minIt’s easy to believe that once we arrange our life correctly, the anxiety will quiet and the sense of lack will disappear. A little more money. A different role. A better version…
- The Quiet Cost of Conditional Worth · 29 minMost people don’t walk around thinking, “My worth is conditional.” They just feel the tension when things aren’t going well—and the relief when they are. This episode sits with…
- Why Knowing How to Speak Up Isn’t Enough · 20 minJoin Dr. Aziz live for a 3-day VIRTUAL event: Not Nice LIVE > Go here for details and tickets. Most people don’t struggle to speak up because they lack communication skills…
- The Nice Trap · 20 minJoin Dr. Aziz LIVE for a 3-day virtual event: Not Nice LIVE > Go here for details and tickets. In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz exposes one of the most…
- The High Cost of Deferring Decisions · 22 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz dives deep into one of the sneakiest traps that keep us stuck: deferring decisions. Whether it’s fear of making the wrong…
- The Truth About Change In The New Year · 27 min🌟 In this empowering kickoff to 2026, Dr. Aziz challenges a deeply held belief: that being nice means you care more. In fact, the opposite might be true. In this episode, you’ll…
- Nice People Don't Care Too Much · 22 minThink you care too much about other people’s feelings? Think again. In this bold kickoff to 2026, Dr. Aziz pulls back the curtain on the real reason “nice people” overextend…
- Become Doubtless - How To Believe In Yourself And Trust In Life · 25 minWhat if your self-doubt wasn’t something you had to live with? What if you could become truly doubtless—able to believe in yourself fully and trust life, no matter what? In…
- When Self-Confidence Isn't Enough · 27 min🌟 In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz explores a surprising truth that almost no one talks about: self-confidence alone can only take you so far. If you’ve ever…
- Stop Fearing Others Feelings · 24 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz dives into one of the most subtle yet powerful patterns that drives social anxiety and people-pleasing: the fear of other…
- Healing The Cause Of Social Anxiety & People Pleasing · 26 minIn this vulnerable and revealing episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz returns from a life-changing couples workshop with a fresh insight into what really causes social…
- How To Keep Going When You're Discouraged · 21 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz offers powerful insight into what to do when you feel like giving up. Whether you're trying to build confidence, face your…
- Boost Confidence And Kill Anxiety At The Same Time · 22 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz reveals the secret to boosting confidence while dissolving anxiety and it’s not another breathing exercise or mindset hack…
- Stop This For 7 Days To Transform Your Confidence · 19 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz issues a bold 7-day challenge that just might transform your confidence: stop apologizing. Not when you bump into someone, but…
- 3 Keys From Conversation Master · 21 minIn this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz shares the Top 3 Keys from the Extremely Confident Conversation Master Training—a powerful 3‑day virtual workshop designed to…
