On Attachment
by Stephanie Rigg
Latest episode
#289: How to Get Out of a Relationship Rut
#289: How to Get Out of a Relationship Rut
About this podcast
Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships.
Episodes
The newest 50 of 289 episodes
- #289: How to Get Out of a Relationship Rut · 25 min · Season 1 Episode 289If you've spent any amount of time in long-term relationships, you've likely experienced a relationship rut: a season where things feel a bit harder, less connected, and more…
- #288: The Difference Between Healthy Needs and Anxious Demands · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 288Preorder my book, The Secure Self How do you know if your needs are reasonable and healthy, or if they're rooted in the anxious attachment patterns you're wanting to shift? This…
- #287: 5 Hard Truths for Avoidant Attachers · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 287Preorder my book, The Secure Self If you have avoidant attachment patterns (or are partnered with someone who does), today's episode offers five truths about your patterns, blind…
- #286: How to Deal With Lingering Thoughts About an Ex (Ask Steph) · 12 min · Season 1 Episode 286Preorder my book, The Secure Self How do you stop your mind from thinking of your ex, even when the relationship is long over? In today's episode, I'm giving advice to a listener…
- #285: How to Respond to Inconsistency and Mixed Messages · 24 min · Season 1 Episode 285Pre-order my book, The Secure Self Being on the receiving end of someone's inconsistent behaviour and mixed messages is a familiar experience for many people with anxious…
- #284: How to Navigate Self-Doubt and Regret After Walking Away (Ask Steph) · 21 min · Season 1 Episode 284Pre-order my book, The Secure Self on Amazon In today's episode, I'm giving advice to a listener who recently stepped away from a long-term, long-distance relationship, over…
- #283: From Self-Abandonment to Self-Worth (Plus TWO Exciting Announcements!) · 37 min · Season 1 Episode 283Pre-order my book, The Secure Self In today's episode, we're talking about self-abandonment and what it really takes to shift away from these well-worn patterns into a more…
- #282: How to Forgive Yourself for Pushing Someone Away (Ask Steph) · 11 min · Season 1 Episode 282In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm giving advice to a listener who is feeling a lot of shame and self-blame for their role in the breakdown of a relationship, which they've come…
- #281: When You Want to Work on the Relationship But Your Partner Doesn't · 22 min · Season 1 Episode 281So many people will know the frustration of wanting to work on your relationship and being met with resistance, shutdown, or disengagement from a partner. When your sincere…
- #280: Why You Feel Jealous About Your Partner's Past (& How to Navigate It) · 15 min · Season 1 Episode 280In today's episode, we're talking about retroactive jealousy — being an excessive preoccupation with a partner's romantic and/or sexual history, and feelings of intense…
- #279: When an Old Love Resurfaces and Starts Pulling Away (Ask Steph) · 14 min · Season 1 Episode 279This week's Ask Steph question comes from a 77 year old listener who recently reconnected with a man she loved 45 years ago, following the passing of her husband of 40 years. He…
- #278: How to Navigate Being Triggered by a Partner's Moodiness · 10 min · Season 1 Episode 278In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering the listener question of "How do I navigate being triggered by my partner's moodiness and irritability?" This is such a common pain…
- #277: What to Look For in a Long-Term Partner · 14 min · Season 1 Episode 277Choosing who you're going to commit to is a life-altering decision — so it's little wonder so many of us feel the weight of that pressure, and experience doubt around whether…
- #276: Attachment & Conflict (Part 4): Repairing After Relationship Rupture · 22 min · Season 1 Episode 276Learning to repair after conflict or ruptures is one of the most valuable relationship skills you'll ever have. But for many of us, meaningful repair isn't something we ever…
- #275: Why You Can't Get Over Your Ex · 22 min · Season 1 Episode 275In today's episode, we're talking about why you struggle to "get over" your ex. This is something so many people struggle with when it comes to break-ups — feeling like the…
- #274: Attachment & Conflict (Part 3): How to Experience Healthier Conflict · 33 min · Season 1 Episode 274Join the Secure Self Challenge here Today's episode is part 3 of my Attachment & Conflict series, and we're talking all about how to transform the way you do conflict. I'll be…
- #273: Attachment & Conflict (Part 2): Avoidant Attachment · 25 min · Season 1 Episode 273Register for the Secure Self Challenge here In today's episode, we're talking once again about how attachment patterns shape our experience of conflict in relationships, with a…
- #272: How to Talk to Your Partner About Their Avoidant Attachment (Ask Steph) · 11 min · Season 1 Episode 272Access the replay for the Anxious Attachment Protest Behaviour workshop In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering the question of: "How do I talk to my partner about their…
- #271: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: Guidance for Partners (Part 4) · 24 min · Season 1 Episode 271Last chance to register for the free Anxious Attachment Protest Behaviour workshop Today's episode is the fourth and final instalment of my deep dive series into fearful avoidant…
- #270: How to Remain Hopeful After Heartbreak & Bad Dating Experiences (Ask Steph) · 12 min · Season 1 Episode 270When you've had a string of heartbreaks, disappointments, and bad dating experiences, remaining hopeful can be a big ask of your system. In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm sharing…
- #269: Stay or Go: How to Know When It's Time to Walk Away · 19 min · Season 1 Episode 269Subscribe to my Substack For many of us who struggle with letting go (and tend towards relationship-fixing at all costs), walking away can feel like a measure of absolute last…
- #268: When You're Not Attracted to Healthy Partners (Ask Steph) · 9 min · Season 1 Episode 268Register for my upcoming live workshop here In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering the question of "How long to keep pursuing a connection with someone who's great and ticks…
- #267: Attachment & Conflict (Part 1): Anxious Attachment · 21 min · Season 1 Episode 267Register for my upcoming free workshop on Anxious Attachment Protest Behaviours In this new series on attachment and conflict, we're exploring the deeper layers that make…
- #266: How to Move from Understanding Your Patterns to Actually Changing Them (Ask Steph) · 17 min · Season 1 Episode 266If you've been "doing the work" for a while now, it's likely you have a firm grip on why you are the way you are. But many of us find ourselves stuck at the "knowledge and…
- #265: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: How to Heal (Part 3) · 25 min · Season 1 Episode 265This week's episode is the much-requested Part 3 of my deep dive on fearful avoidant attachment — and today, we're talking about what it takes to heal. We cover shame…
- #264: The One Thing You Should Never Do in Relationships (from Substack) · 8 min · Season 1 Episode 264Subscribe to my Substack, Notes to Self I've recently launched on Substack, and today's episode is a read-out of a recent article I wrote there titled The One Thing You Should…
- #263: How to Stop Obsessing About Someone · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 263"How do I stop obsessively ruminating about the person who rejected me?" is one of the most frequently asked questions I receive — and in today's episode, we're talking all about…
- #262: How to Navigate Feeling Behind in Life (Ask Steph) · 10 min · Season 1 Episode 262In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering a listener's question about feeling like she's fallen behind in life after going through a break-up in her mid-30s, particularly as…
- #261: Sex, Intimacy, and Attachment Styles · 21 min · Season 1 Episode 261Subscribe to my YouTube Channel How do our attachment patterns influence our relationship to — and experience of — sex and intimacy? That's what we're exploring in today's…
- #260: Can You Become Anxiously Attached from Dating an Avoidant Person? (Ask Steph) · 10 min · Season 1 Episode 260Subscribe to my YouTube channel Is it possible to become anxiously attached as a result of dating someone with avoidant patterns? That's the listener question I'm answering in…
- #259: How to Communicate with a Defensive Partner · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 259Subscribe to my YouTube Channel Does your partner get defensive easily, even when you feel like you weren't being attacking or critical? If so, today's episode is for you. Being…
- #258: When Your Partner Isn't Respecting Your Boundaries (Ask Steph) · 10 min · Season 1 Episode 258Subscribe to my YouTube Channel How do you navigate a situation where your partner isn't respecting the boundaries that you've set? That's the listener question I'm answering in…
- #257: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: How It Shows Up in Relationships (Part 2) · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 257Subscribe to my YouTube Channel Today's episode is a follow-up from last week's deep dive into fearful avoidant attachment. This week, we're looking at the fearful avoidant in…
- #256: How to Balance Accepting Your Partner & Supporting Their Growth (Ask Steph) · 11 min · Season 1 Episode 256Subscribe to my YouTube Channel In today's Ask Steph episode, we're talking about how to balance accepting your partner for who they are, while also encouraging them to grow…
- #255: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: Origins & Core Wounds (Part 1) · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 255Subscribe to my YouTube Channel In today's episode, we're diving deep into the fearful avoidant (or disorganised) attachment style. We're talking about where it originates, and…
- #254: Healthy Privacy vs. Unhealthy Secrecy in Relationships (Ask Steph) · 13 min · Season 1 Episode 254Subscribe to my YouTube Channel What's the difference between reasonable, healthy privacy and unhealthy secret-keeping? That's the question I'm answering in today's Ask Steph…
- #253: Perfectionism in Anxious-Avoidant Relationships · 20 min · Season 1 Episode 253Subscribe to my YouTube Channel In today's episode, we're diving deep into perfectionism — and how it can sneak into our relationship dynamics in unhelpful ways. We'll talk about…
- #252: Finding Self-Compassion When Everything is Falling Apart (Ask Steph) · 8 min · Season 1 Episode 252How do you find self-compassion when everything is falling to pieces? That's the listener question I'm answering in today's Ask Steph episode. We'll talk about why…
- #251: How I Approach Nervous System Regulation & Wellbeing · 15 min · Season 1 Episode 251In this episode, I’m sharing how I personally approach nervous system regulation in a way that feels simple, realistic, and actually sustainable, rather than overwhelming myself…
- #250: Are They Avoidant or Just Not That Into You? (Ask Steph) · 12 min · Season 1 Episode 250Understanding Your Avoidant Partner: New Course Many people find themselves trying to decode confusing or inconsistent behaviour, wondering whether it reflects avoidant…
- #249: The First 30 Days After a Breakup · 19 min · Season 1 Episode 249In today’s episode, I’m walking you through how to navigate the first 30 days after a breakup in a way that is supportive, grounded, and deeply healing. This initial period can…
- #248: How to Cope With My Ex Being Happy in a New Relationship (Ask Steph) · 12 min · Season 1 Episode 248In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re talking about how to cope when your ex seems to have moved on soon after your break-up — and is now in a new relationship that appears to be…
- #247: Is It Your Anxious Attachment... or the Wrong Relationship? · 15 min · Season 1 Episode 247In today’s episode, we’re unpacking one of the most common (and confusing) questions for people with anxious attachment: is it me, or is there something genuinely not right in…
- #246: When Is It a Good Idea to Be Friends with an Ex? (Ask Steph) · 9 min · Season 1 Episode 246In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re exploring a common question: is it ever a good idea to be friends with an ex? While staying connected can sometimes feel comforting after a…
- #245: Should Anxiously Attached People Just Avoid Avoidants? · 10 min · Season 1 Episode 245In today’s episode, I’m unpacking why I don’t give the common advice for anxiously attached people to simply avoid avoidant partners. While it might seem like a straightforward…
- #244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph) · 7 min · Season 1 Episode 244In this Ask Steph episode, I’m responding to a question I hear more often than you might expect. Someone has done a lot of work on their anxious attachment patterns, they feel…
- #243: How to Create Healthy, Balanced Relationships with Nedra Glover Tawwab · 44 min · Season 1 Episode 243In this episode, I’m joined by therapist, bestselling author, and boundaries expert Nedra Glover Tawwab for a powerful conversation on what it really means to have healthy…
- #242: When Does Self-Improvement Become Self-Sabotage? (Ask Steph) · 7 min · Season 1 Episode 242In this Ask Steph episode, I respond to a listener question about the fine line between personal growth and the endless pursuit of self-improvement. While healing, reflection…
- #241: How to Date from Self-Worth · 18 min · Season 1 Episode 241Modern dating can be tough. Between apps, ghosting, and the uncertainty that often comes with meeting strangers outside our social circles, the whole process can be seriously…
- #240: The #1 Thing to Focus On to Heal Anxious Attachment (Ask Steph) · 7 min · Season 1 Episode 240In today’s Ask Steph episode, I’m answering the listener question: If you were only going to focus on one thing to start healing anxious attachment, what would it be? While there…
