A Codependent Mind
by Brian and Stephanie
S9 - Appendices 4: Authenticity
About this podcast
Get an intimate, honest look at how codependency can develop and how it can be overcome. Brian and Stephanie take you ’behind the scenes’ of their experiences and their relationship, lifting the veil on how codependent behaviors can cause life long pain and suffering if not addressed. Learn how Brian has been able to understand the web of behaviors that formed his codependency and move on to build healthier relationships.
Season one explores the origins of Brian’s codependent behaviors and the connection between Codependency and trauma. In addition to answering the question ”what is codependency?”, episodes on trauma bonding, narcissism, shame detail out how behaviors emerging from his childhood interpersonal trauma prevented him from developing healthy relationships as he grew into adulthood. In fact, they left him vulnerable to other disordered people like narcissists thereby exposing him to more trauma and entrenching the codependent habits even further.
In season two, we outline how Brian went about healing the trauma the formed the root of his codependency. We discuss how Brian was able to recognize the abuse he had suffered and was suffering and in doing so, finally get clarity about and distance from his relationships with narcissist; how he was able to learn how to sit with his emotions, recognize what they were, where they came from and how to process them; how he had to re-write the stories about himself and his past that weren’t serving him and were actually preventing him from living an authentic, integrated life; and how he worked, and is working, to break the codependent habits that were destructive to his well being and not conducive to forming healthy, integrated relationships.
Even after understanding and healing from codependency, Brian is still left with re-learning how to navigate relationships in a way that produces the kind of intimate, nurturing connections that he has always longed for. Season three addresses topics that come up in that process.
In the fourth season, we investigate core concepts about relationships and the ways in which codependent behaviors can make it difficult to form and sustain loving, intimate relationships.
Season 5 brings other voices into the conversations as we speak with guests who share their own ’making and re-making’ stories. We also take the opportunity to do an updated episode on narcissism.
Season 6 was a reading of the book ”The Making and the Re-Making of A Codependent Mind.” The book is available on Amazon as a paperback, ebook or audiobook. The audiobook is also available on Spotify and other platforms.
For season 7, each episode will focus on the tools needed to make a relationship work post-codependency.
Episodes
The newest 20 of 79 episodes
- S9 - Appendices 4: Authenticity · 35 min · Season 9 Episode 4We are back with another appendices, this one on the topic of authenticity. We've had a couple of posts go viral on Facebook and Instagram that we are connected to this idea of…
- S9 - Appendices 3: Boundaries in Action: · 45 min · Season 9 Episode 3Set boundaries! Respect yourself! Easier said than done. In this episode we discuss our own recent struggle to maintain our boundaries/self-respect while also trying to maintain…
- S9 - Appendices 2: Behavior Check-In · 34 min · Season 9 Episode 2Brian recently read through both our books and did some self-analysis on where he is at on his 'growth journey.' In this episode we discuss some of his findings. If you…
- S9 - Appendices 1: Shame · 35 min · Season 9 Episode 1Brian and Stephanie come back for an ad hoc season and start with another discussion of shame. This time they tackle the question of what kind of relationship work shame can do…
- S8 - Chapter 14: Gratitude · 18 min · Season 8 Episode 14The full book in paperback, hard cover and eBook available on Amazon - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FC6M5X5M/ The audiobook is available on our website…
- S8 - Chapter 1: A New Kind of Relationship · 19 min · Season 8 Episode 1The full book in paperback, hard cover and eBook available on Amazon - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FC6M5X5M/ The audiobook is available on our website…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #22: Caretaking · 24 min · Season 7 Episode 22Our new book is available in eBook format: ! You, Me & Us: Moving Beyond Relational Trauma and Disorder (Anxious/Avoidant Attachment, Codependency, BPD) to Build a Stable…
- S7: Relationship Tool #21: Love Languages · 27 min · Season 7 Episode 21The 5 Love Languages claims to be a "simple and effective" tool for strengthening your connections. We explore that claim. Thank you for following, liking, reviewing - it helps…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #20: Being Present · 30 min · Season 7 Episode 20For most of his life, Brian believed that his primary challenge in relationships was mastering the tool of "being present." He thought that if he could just fully grasp this…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #19: Relationship Boundaries · 43 min · Season 7 Episode 19In this episode, we building on the Boundaries episode and talk more about Relationship Boundaries in particular. How can you use relationship boundaries do develop a greater…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #18: Jealousy · 22 min · Season 7 Episode 18In this episode, we take on the complex emotion of jealousy, exploring its potential as a constructive tool within relationships. As we have discussed in previous episodes…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #17: Entitlement · 43 min · Season 7 Episode 17We have talked about entitlement quite a bit. Mostly about how Brian's narcissistic partners have used their feelings of entitlement as fuel to abuse and mistreat him and other…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #16: Sex · 28 min · Season 7 Episode 16In Season 4, we had a four part series on codependency, trauma and sex. In this episode we focus on the role sex can play in a relationship For Brian, shifting from a performance…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #15: Communication · 33 min · Season 7 Episode 15Communication is vital to any relationship, but for those of us with relational trauma, it can be difficult to figure out what that means. If we aren't getting yelled at or…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #14: Attention · 33 min · Season 7 Episode 14In this episode we discuss the relationship tool of attention. Paying attention can be difficult for people with relationship trauma and codependent habits. It was certainly…
- S7 - Relationship Toolkit #13: Conflict · 34 min · Season 7 Episode 13Brian spent most of his life being 'conflict avoidant' at least that is how he understood it. Really the powerlessness and shame that underlied his codependency meant that any…
- S7 - Relationship Tool #12: Apology · 30 min · Season 7 Episode 12Can you tell the difference between a genuine apology and apology theater? In this episode, we discuss to tool of apology - how narcissists use it, how Brian used it…
- S7 - Relationship Toolkit # 11: Gratitude · 30 min · Season 7 Episode 11Be grateful! We are told that at various points on our lives as was to cure numerous ails in our lives and in the world. In this episode, we talk about what gratitude can and…
- S7 - Relationship Toolkit #10: Money · 39 min · Season 7 Episode 10As discussed in a previous episode, Brian used money to fuel his codependent habits. Healing from codependency also involved developing a new understanding of the role money…
- S7 - Relationship Toolkit #9: Boundaries · 45 min · Season 7 Episode 9Boundaries are an expression of the distinction between me and you. Understanding and respecting that distinction is critical when setting up a relationship structure that will…







