It's Not About the Alcohol
by Colleen Freeland
EP362 Thinking about rehab? How to give yourself a break before it…
About this podcast
Would you like to reduce your alcohol consumption by about 80 percent? Become the version of you who can just "take it or leave it" so that you can enjoy drinking socially without relying on alcohol to manage your stress, anxiety, loneliness and boredom when you're by yourself?
Most high achieving women assume over-drinking is caused by a lack of willpower--or worse, the incurable disease of "alcoholism." So they beat themselves up and avoid asking for help because they feel ashamed and out of control.
Whether you're a daily drinker who can't break the habit, or you're still going to sobriety meetings even though you don't drink anymore, the real problem is that you don't trust yourself.
Which means it's not about the alcohol. It's about your relationship with yourself.
Colleen Freeland is a a mindful drinking coach helping professional women learn how drinking less (or not at all) is actually a superpower, even when the idea of giving up the only thing that helps them quiet their mind feels impossible.
The solution to alcohol use disorder is a FEELING. If you felt comfortable in your own skin and at ease in your life, you would drink like someone who is comfortable and at ease!
Join me each week for holistic, evidence-based strategies to fix your dopamine deficit, regulate your nervous system, cure imposter syndrome, manage sugar cravings, improve your sleep and reclaim your mental health so you no longer have the urge to escape your own body.
Get happy, not sober. Because happy people don't drink themselves into a stupor.
Episodes
The newest 50 of 363 episodes
- EP362 Thinking about rehab? How to give yourself a break before it gets that bad. · 29 min · Season 1 Episode 362You can't remember the last time you felt truly relaxed. You keep going because everything has to get done, and some days the idea of checking yourself into rehab sounds less…
- EP361 Your drinking isn't a "problem." It's an invitation to stop letting fear, shame and guilt make your decisions. · 24 min · Season 1 Episode 261You've thought about getting help with your drinking. Then the bad night fades, and suddenly it feels like an overreaction or it doesn't seem necessary. This episode explains why…
- EP360 Why you drink more after bariatric surgery (and how to decide whether to quit or cut back) with Ruby Williams · 39 min · Season 1 Episode 360If you've had bariatric surgery, and now you're drinking more than you ever have, you may be wondering if quitting is your only option. This conversation shows you why the answer…
- EP359 The hidden reasons why you drink too much (and what really needs to change) · 34 min · Season 1 Episode 313You've been negotiating new rules every time you break the old ones, and you still can't figure out why "just drink less" never sticks. The answer isn't in your glass. It's in…
- EP358 Why you need wine when you're stressed (and how to reduce cravings without whiteknuckling) with Sian Cook · 38 min · Season 1 Episode 358You eat clean, you handle everything, and by five o'clock you still feel like you need a glass of wine to calm down. Sian Cook, a former client trained in medicine, explains what…
- EP357: Your drinking isn't self-indulgent. It's self-denial. Here's the difference. · 23 min · Season 1 Episode 342You've been telling yourself you drink too much because you love it too much. That's not what's happening. This episode shows you the rules you've been following since childhood…
- EP356 The real reason you can't follow through on your promise to "not drink" tonight · 17 min · Season 1 Episode 308You have discipline in every other area of your life. You follow through, you deliver, you keep everything running. So why is it that the one night you tell yourself no drinking…
- EP355 How to be truly free from the desire to drink (without willpower) · 28 min · Season 1 Episode 355You've done a lot of work and you've definitely improved. But you're still drinking more than you want. And there's a critical voice in your head that keeps insisting you should…
- EP354: If it feels like your drinking hasn't changed, track this metric instead · 26 min · Season 1 Episode 354You're still drinking more than you should, and you want to know if real change actually is a slow process, or if you're just making excuses so you don't have to quit. Here's the…
- EP353: Your brain talks you into drinking. Here's how to talk back. · 24 min · Season 1 Episode 350You wake up asking the same question you asked yesterday. What the hell is wrong with me? But you've already decided the answer is that you're drinking is out of control. This…
- EP352: Drinking turns off your brain. Planning to quit turns it back on. Here's how to break the cycle. · 45 min · Season 1 Episode 352You wake up feeling rough and decide, "I'm not drinking tonight." For a few hours, that plan feels solid. But evening comes and you pour one anyway. And now your brain has even…
- EP351: Why joy is key to drinking less (not discipline) · 32 min · Episode 351You've been telling yourself that if you were more disciplined, then you wouldn't drink as much as you do. But the problem isn't that you need more control. It's that giving…
- EP350: How to tell the difference between self-care and self-sabotage (before your next drink) · 34 min · Season 1 Episode 350You set a plan to take a break from drinking and made it a few days. Then you blew it. And now you're trying to figure out why you keep breaking promises to yourself when it…
- EP349 Why you can't say no to wine at night (it's a capacity problem, not a willpower problem) · 39 min · Season 1 Episode 349You keep telling yourself you'll take the night off, or at least stop at two glasses. But then you drain the entire bottle (as usual). This episode shows you why that's not a…
- EP348: Why wondering if you're an alcoholic makes you drink more (and a better question to ponder) · 30 min · Season 1 Episode 348If you're an alcoholic, how is it possible that you can get more done before breakfast than most people do in a week? And yet, you still know that you drink too much. So you…
- EP347: Why you can drink a whole bottle and not feel "drunk" (and how to retrain your brain) · 34 min · Season 1 Episode 347You've always been a little proud of your high tolerance. You can drink grown men under the table and still walk and talk like a rockstar in four inch heels. But lately it scares…
- EP346: How to cope with conflict in your relationship without drinking with Karen McMahon · 47 min · Season 1 Episode 346You've been drinking more lately because of your partner. Their mood is the problem. Their lack of effort. Their inability to have an honest conversation. But if this is their…
- EP345: The KNOW-DO Gap: Why you keep drinking when you know you shouldn't. · 37 min · Season 1 Episode 345You know you should be drinking less, but you can't follow through. You promise and plan to do something different and then repeat the same mistakes over and over. This episode…
- EP344: The Hidden Hormone Imbalance Making You Drink Too Much (And The Labs Your Doctor Isn't Running) · 49 min · Season 1 Episode 344You've been blaming yourself for drinking too much. You assume the brain fog, the fatigue, the weight you can't shift, the way you can't stick to your plan, all of it, is because…
- EP343: Why drinking to relax anxiety makes it's worse (and what to do instead) · 32 min · Episode 343You've been searching for something to take the edge off. Some tool or strategy that can help you relax so you don't feel like you need to drink so much. CBD. THC gummies. A…
- EP342 Change THIS if you want to drink like a normal person again · 31 min · Episode 342You've been told that the best way to stop drinking too much is to stop drinking entirely. This episode shows you why that advice usually doesn't work for high-achieving women…
- EP341: Why You Need Alcohol To Go To Sleep (And how to break the pattern) · 31 min · Season 1 Episode 341You can't fall asleep without a few drinks. Every time you've tried going to bed without it, you end up back on the couch an hour later pouring a glass because your brain…
- EP340: Why your drinking makes perfect sense (and how to actually rewire your brain) · 35 min · Season 1 Episode 340You've been kicking yourself for finishing the bottle (again) when you promised it was going to be just one glass. This episode explains why trying harder isn't working, and…
- EP339: The 3 Hidden Patterns Behind Overdrinking in Busy and Successful Women · 22 min · Season 1 Episode 339You're not a woman who needs more information. You read the books. You follow the sober curious accounts. You've done Dry January. You've downloaded Sunnyside or Reframe. Every…
- EP338 Minisode: Why You Can Explain Your Drinking But Still Can't Change It · 31 min · Episode 338In this episode, Colleen pulls apart something that sounds right, but quietly keeps women stuck: thinking about your feelings instead of actually feeling them. Because most women…
- EP337: Why drinking every night destroys your confidence (and how to stop) · 54 min · Episode 337Now that I'm on the other side of my recent slip back into drinking every night, I can see exactly what happened—and more importantly, I can explain the mechanism that makes this…
- EP336 Minisode: Why Giving Yourself Permission To Drink Actually Helps You Drink Less · 29 min · Episode 336In this episode, Colleen revisits one of the hardest ideas to trust at first: that before your drinking changes, you have to stop making your drinking the enemy. And yes… that…
- EP335: I was drinking every night again. Here's how I stopped. · 39 min · Season 1 Episode 335Colleen gets really personal in this episode. She shares the hard winter that (at one point) sent her back to nightly drinking, financial stress, the loss of her dog, feeling…
- EP334 Minisode: Lower your tolerance without taking a break from alcohol · 29 min · Episode 334In this episode, Colleen pulls on a thread most women don't question: that moment where you're a drink or two in and thinking, "I'm not even feeling this." And instead of solving…
- Ep333: Three Simple Practices To Improve Your Willpower TONIGHT · 44 min · Season 1 Episode 333You made the promise this morning,"I'm not going to drink tonight." You meant it. Then the day happened. And by 6pm, the drink was in your hand like that was the plan all along…
- EP332 Minisode: Become Your Own Source Of Comfort (So You Don't Need Alcohol) · 26 min · Episode 332In this episode, Colleen names something most women have never been taught to do: have a relationship with themselves. Not self-improvement. Not fixing. Not managing behavior…
- EP331: Workaholism and Over-Drinking Are the Same Problem — Here's the One Shift That Fixes Both · 43 min · Season 1 Episode 331What if the habit you're most proud of — your drive, your work ethic, your ability to get things done — is quietly running on the same fuel as the habit you're trying to change?…
- EP330 Minisode: How to leverage your dopamine so that alcohol is less appealing · 30 min · Episode 330In this episode, Colleen revisits the biochemistry of change through the lens of dopamine — not as a science lesson, but as a practical explanation for why so many women stay…
- EP329: Why your brain classifies alcohol as medicine, and how microdosing psilocybin changes that w/ Victoria Lee Starr · 46 min · Season 1 Episode 329If you've ever reached for a glass of wine at the end of a hard day without really deciding to, this episode is going to explain exactly why that happens — and why it has nothing…
- EP328 Minisode: The #1 Lie That Makes You Want To Drink · 19 min · Episode 328In this minisode, Colleen explores one of the most powerful lies we tell ourselves when we feel overwhelmed or stuck: "I don't have a choice." It sounds practical, even…
- EP327: Why Getting Sober Didn't Fix My Drinking Problem (And What Actually Did) · 59 min · Episode 327You've been told your drinking is the problem. That if you could just control the behavior — stay sober long enough, count your days, follow the rules — the shame would go away…
- EP326 Minisode: Three Mindset Shifts That Changed My Relationship With Alcohol · 22 min · Episode 326In this episode, Colleen shares a coaching moment that started with a simple scheduling mistake and turned into a powerful lesson about belief systems. When a client didn't get…
- EP325: Why women who pursue financial abundance can take or leave alcohol with Mystic Millionaire Danielle Amos · 1 h 5 min · Episode 325What do your drinking and your bank account have in common? More than you think. In this episode, I sit down with mindset coach and Mystic Millionaire Danielle Amos to explore…
- EP324: Stop trying to reduce your drinking. Do THIS instead. · 34 min · Episode 324For two years, "reduce your drinking by 80%" was my signature phrase. It's on my website, my ads, my podcast — everywhere. In this episode, I tell you why I retired it, what I…
- EP323: How to reverse the shift from "fun" drinking to "coping with stress" drinking · 27 min · Episode 323Most women measure alcohol consumption by how much and how often they drink. But the research says the most important predictor of whether your drinking becomes a real problem…
- EP322 Minisode: What Big Setbacks With Drinking Really Mean About Your Ability To Change · 22 min · Episode 322✦ February Bonus ✦ Join The Next Chapter by February 28, 2026 and receive $2,000 off. In this episode, Colleen reframes one of the biggest misunderstandings about drinking: it's…
- EP321: How to tell if your cravings are physical or mental (and what to do about each) · 51 min · Episode 321You think your cravings are a willpower problem. They're not. You think if you could just think differently, you'd drink differently. And that's exactly why nothing has worked…
- EP320 Minisode: Why You Keep Breaking Your Own Rules About Drinking · 21 min · Episode 320In this episode, Colleen continues sharing takeaways from her retreat with Dr. Amanda Hanson (midlifemuse) — and she names something that sits underneath so much of women's…
- EP319: The #1 skill that will reduce your drinking without (much) willpower · 45 min · Episode 319You told yourself this morning you weren't going to drink tonight. But now that it's time to make that decision, it feels impossible to say no. That moment is exactly what…
- EP318: Want to know why some women can take or leave alcohol? · 8 min · Episode 318Do you want to know what's different about the women who can genuinely take or leave alcohol? And why it feels impossible for you to be "more like them?" In this episode, I'm…
- EP317 Why talk therapy isn't enough to change your drinking with Dr. Amanda Hanson · 58 min · Episode 317I was one of the most therapized people you've ever met. I knew my triggers. I'd unpacked my daddy issues, my relationship with my mom, my insecurity, my eating disorders…
- EP316 Minisode: Next Time You Want To Numb Your Emotions With Alcohol, Try This Instead · 22 min · Episode 316In this episode, Colleen shares a raw, surprising takeaway from a recent retreat — one that had nothing to do with learning new concepts and everything to do with experiencing…
- EP315 What I do the morning after I drink too much · 38 min · Episode 315I woke up a little hungover this morning. I had a third glass of wine I didn't need. And instead of spiraling into shame, I did what I always do now—I grabbed my journal and got…
- EP314 Minisode: How to pull yourself out of a funk without pouring a drink · 23 min · Episode 314In this episode, Colleen responds to a question many women hit right after real momentum begins: What if I slip back? What if the funk comes back and I lose everything I've…
- EP313 Three Tools that will help you drink less without relying on willpower · 49 min · Episode 313Why does the wine start calling at 5pm—even when you promised yourself this morning you wouldn't drink tonight? In this episode, Colleen breaks down exactly what's happening in…







